FURminators for spring coats

There are many tools used to groom animals. I particularly like the Matbuster®. It’s great for raking through kitty mats without risk of cutting skin. When I purchased a FURminator® for the cats, I was less than impressed. It’s a clipper blade to which a handle had been attached. Big whoop. It was trademarked, and the inventor is making zillions. Besides wishing I had thought of this myself, I also wish I held the patent for Velcro® and had purchased Google stock when the IPO was one dollar a share. The small unit worked OK. In the past my cat groomer had recommended to take a clipper blade without the clipper, and comb the cats with it. The cats were not amused. Once a cat decides it’s had enough, you are done. Call it a day.

The Wonder Husky isn’t that easy to furminate either. I love nouns that turn into verbs, by the way. To medal in the Olympics is a favorite. Huskies typically shed their undercoats in June, and once again before winter sets in, usually late September. For the past two years, Siberians have been dumping their coats all summer, making the yard look like a snowscape. I asked Mary, who has the boarding kennel where Tipper goes and has Huskies, if she experienced the same thing. She did. Huskies can be furminated, but it is tough when they really need to have their coats baled. Many people save the fur from their Huskies, Malamutes and Samoyeds to turn into wool. When Tip gets close to being done shedding, I take her to Mary with instructions to bathe her and return half a pup. I really can’t see myself wearing a sweater made out of my dog.

My sister sent us a wide FURminator® for the horses. Margo swears by it. By golly, she was right! Horses lose their coats all spring, and it’s a real mess. The hair gets all over your clothes, and since it adheres to Chapstick, it’s not all that tasty, either. Phthooey! The birds appreciate it though, for their nests. I’ve been furminating the ponies during the warm weather we’ve had this winter. Scoot and Hannah know they look stylin’.

Today I went outside to clean the barn. Getting the wheelbarrow out involves tossing hay out the window, so the horses go around outside and eat while I clean, instead of trying to get into the hay room for a snack. Scooter, in his inimitable spirit, chose to pick the shovel up in his teeth and sweep it from side to side. Mother’s little helper. I couldn’t clean at that moment because I was laughing too hard, so I got the Furminator and began to run it gently over Scoot’s and Hannah’s coats. Bingo! After Thursday’s blizzard, they were ready to be groomed.

I emailed my sister earlier in the month to tell her I was maniacally furminating the horses, and was there a 12-step program for this. She was pleased that her gift was so well received, telling me how her horses in Arizona were shedding as well. OK, now I love my wonderful sister, but isn’t there just a little bit of difference between an Arizona winter coat and a Colorado winter coat? How hard can that be to get a winter coat off horses that live an hour from Mexico?

Send me your favorite noun that has morphed into a verb. Be sure to use it in a sentence. There will be extra credit for this assignment.

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